Rob1

Do you have pet insurance? Because your pussy's getting smashed tonight!

Sarah goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?" Sarah waves her hand, "Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!" Miss Rogers says, "All right, Sarah, what is your multi-syllable word?" Sarah says, "Mas-tur-bate." Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, Sarah, that's a mouthful." Sarah says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."

Are your legs made of Nutella? Because I'd love to spread them!

Two and a half men , Ashame it went a bit gay after Charlie left lol

I wonder what your chaturbate name is? lol.

She is without doubt a milf , I like milfs anyway , I sure did enjoy Sabrina's mum's stay lol

When she doesn't smile she looks like a man or a very angry woman lol , angry women turn me on anyway lmao

You know what I like in a girl? [What?] My dick

I like every bone in your body, especially mine

I might not go down in history, but I’ll go down on you!

After picking her son up from school one day, the mother asks him what he did at school. The kid replies, "I had sex with my teacher." She gets so mad that when they get home, she orders him to go straight to his room. When the father returns home that evening, the mother angrily tells him the news of what their son had done. As the father hears the news, a huge grin spreads across his face. He walks to his son's room and asks him what happened at school, the son tells him, "I had sex with my teacher." The father tells the boy that he is so proud of him, and he is going to reward him with the bike he has been asking for. On the way to the store, the dad asks his son if he would like to ride his new bike home. His son responds, "No thanks Dad, my butt still hurts."

I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?†The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.†“Onions?†the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.†This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?†The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.†“A Christmas tree?†the daughter asks. “Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.â€

Nothing wrong with her face all she needs is a little bit of cum on her face. Oh crap better wipe my screen i think i cummed to fast lol , ok too much information lmao. She is as beautiful as on a face lol.

Well that's good news for me lol

Please only post positive comments and be respectful Welcome to the house of fun Lola

Boy says to his friend hey guess what Friend what? Boy I just lost my virginity Friend to who? Boy Virgin Media Friend that's not how you lose your virginity

I named my dick the truth , cause bitches can't handle it

There are 8 planets in the universe , but only 7 after I destroy Uranus

You work at a Post Office? Cause I saw you checking out my package

Paul was playing golf he thought he got a PAR but no it was a bogey.

Zoya buys Lev a pussy Lev decides to lick the pussy Zoya shouts why are you licking the pussy cat? Lev replys ain't that what pussys are for?

You sure that's not a dick under her dress that is some big cameltoe lol

Nice birthday wishes guys but you don't want to scare Debbie too much because at the moment it looks like she is going to get boner attacked lmao

Happy bday Debbie hope you have a good one. My suggestion is to go wild,dirty,have fun and get drunk but don't go to wild or dirty lol