Scotsman84 Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 Create an account to see this content! Scorpio 22, RUBBERMAN, Wazzer and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scotsman84 Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 Create an account to see this content! RUBBERMAN, delta10, Johnny and 2 others 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scotsman84 Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 Create an account to see this content! Wazzer, delta10, Johnny and 2 others 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scotsman84 Posted May 31, 2019 Share Posted May 31, 2019 Create an account to see this content! Scorpio 22, Wazzer, Johnny and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RUBBERMAN Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 Create an account to see this content! DIRTYHARRY, delta10, Scotsman84 and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RUBBERMAN Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 Create an account to see this content! Wazzer, delta10, DIRTYHARRY and 1 other 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RUBBERMAN Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 Create an account to see this content! Scotsman84, Johnny, DIRTYHARRY and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hung7 Posted June 1, 2019 Share Posted June 1, 2019 On 9/17/2018 at 5:26 PM, delta10 said: With the summer in the UK being hotter than typical for a prolonged period sights almost as bad as this were too common The heat clearly affected the appropriate selection of ' If you've got it flaunt it ' and ' If you've got it hide it ' I was visiting my sister in the hospital after she had a baby. It was off hours for visiting so we were sitting in the hallway. I look up and there is a woman walking down the hallway in a hospital gown who was built just like this woman and her stomach was hanging down to her knees. I couldn't eat for days lol Scotsman84 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
box_hunter Posted June 3, 2019 Share Posted June 3, 2019 Ed came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber. He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said "You died in your sleep, Ed". Ed was stunned. "I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!" St. Peter said "I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back... and that is as a chicken". Ed was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking and pecking the ground. A rooster strolled past. "So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?" "Not bad" replied Ed the hen "but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!" "You're ovulating" explained the rooster. "Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before?" "Never" said Ed. "Well, just relax and let it happen" says the rooster. "It's no big deal". He did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg! He was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg - his joy was overwhelming. As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard... "Ed, wake up! You've shit the bed!" Getting OLD just aint what they said it would be! Scorpio 22 and delta10 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
box_hunter Posted June 3, 2019 Share Posted June 3, 2019 One day a young woman had just started playing her round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. Her pain was so intense that she decided to return to the clubhouse for help and to complain. Her golf pro saw her come into the clubhouse and asked "Why are you back in so early? What's wrong?" "I was stung by a bee" she said. "Where?'" he asked. "Between the first and second hole" she replied. He nodded knowingly and said "Then your feet were too far apart". Wazzer, Scorpio 22, Johnny and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
box_hunter Posted June 3, 2019 Share Posted June 3, 2019 Gus was having problems with premature ejaculation so he decided to go to the doctor. He asked the doctor what he could do to cure his problem. In response, the doctor said "When you feel like you are getting ready to ejaculate, try startling yourself". That same day Gus went to the store and bought himself a starter pistol. All excited to try this suggestion, he ran home to Becky. At home, he found Becky was in bed, naked and waiting. As the two began, they found themselves in the celebrated 69 position. Gus, moments later, felt the sudden urge to ejaculate and fired the starter pistol. The next day, Gus went back to the doctor. The doctor asked "How did it go?" "Well, not as I'd expected. When I fired the pistol, Becky shit on my face, bit three inches off my dick, and my neighbour came out of the closet with his hands in the air". Johnny, delta10, Scorpio 22 and 1 other 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
box_hunter Posted June 3, 2019 Share Posted June 3, 2019 A new Army Lieutenant, let's call him Jim Browning, was assigned to an outfit in a remote post in the Iraqi Desert. During his first inspection of the outfit, he noticed a camel hitched up behind the mess tent. He asked Sgt Huntington why the camel was kept there. The nervous sergeant said "Sir, as you know, there are 250 men here on the post and no women". "Sometimes the men have urges. That's why we have Milly the Camel". The Lieutenant said "I can't say that I condone this, but I can understand about the "urges" so the camel can stay". About a month later, the young Lieutenant Browning starts having his own urges. Crazed with passion, he asked the Sgt Huntington to bring the camel to his tent. Putting a ladder behind the camel, Browning stands on the ladder, pulls his pants down and has wild and insane sex with the camel. When he's done, he asked the Sgt Huntington "Is that how the men do it?" "No sir. They usually just ride the camel into town... that's where the girls are..." Scorpio 22 and delta10 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
box_hunter Posted June 3, 2019 Share Posted June 3, 2019 The guy next to me on the train pulled out a photo of his wife and said "She's beautiful, isn't she?" I said "If you think SHE'S beautiful, you should see MY girlfriend mate". He said "Why? Is she a stunner?" I said "No, she's an optician". Scotsman84, Dragnet, Wazzer and 4 others 1 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
box_hunter Posted June 4, 2019 Share Posted June 4, 2019 Create an account to see this content! Bandit, Wazzer, Scotsman84 and 2 others 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
box_hunter Posted June 4, 2019 Share Posted June 4, 2019 Create an account to see this content! Dragnet, Wazzer, RUBBERMAN and 4 others 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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