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need a laugh when rlc is dead #3


StnCld316

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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN

-Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket according to lights and darks.
-Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
-If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
-Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups / leg-lifts, etc.
-Get in the shower.
-Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
-Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
-Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
-Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.
-Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
-Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and Jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair..
-Shave armpits and legs.
-Turn off shower.
-Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
-Spray mould spots with tile cleaner.
-Get out of shower.
-Dry with towel the size of a small country.
-Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
-Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see partner along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN

-Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
-Walk naked to the bathroom.
-If you see partner along the way, shake willy at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
-Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
-Admire the size of your willy and scratch your bum.
-Get in the shower.
-Wash your face.
-Wash your armpits.
-Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
-Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash your bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on the soap.
-Wash your hair.
-Make a Shampoo Mohican
-Wee.
-Rinse off and get out of shower.
-Partially dry off.
-Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath the whole time.
-Admire willy size in mirror again.
-Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
-Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
-If you pass partner, pull off towel, shake willy at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
-Throw wet towel on bed.

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