Max 2017

I bought a racehorse today, I called him My Face. I don't care if he doesn't win, I just want to hear a load of posh twats shouting, "Come on My Face." What has a slice of toast and a pregnant girlfriend got in common? In both cases you wish you took it out a few seconds earlier. My boss said to me, "I bet you can't see your dick when you look down in the shower." "No, just your daughter's head," I replied.

I told my crush at school, "If you love me, come wearing red tomorrow." The next day she came in wearing black! When she dropped her pen and she bent over to pick it up, I got a look up her skirt at her red thong. Moral of the story: She really loves me underneath it all.

Alpha Dog.

Zombie Nation.

Camel.

Take it these 3 don't have many fans.... they never seem to be home when I check the apartments

Rifle.

XXX.

White Men Can't Jump.

Visitors.

Yes. Have you masturbated in a court or police station?

Bullet.

High performance gas guzzler. Nice eyes or nice smile?

Good riddance you stuck up cow.

Welcome. Don't watch them so wouldn't know.

Toast. Go out for a drink or sit in and drink?

Yes. Tied gf up. Have you been caught peeing outside?

Safehouse.

Has to pay the rent some way. lol

She spends more time in bed than a patient in ICU.

Michael Myers.

Hannibal Lecter.

Next Friday.

Metro.

Think they might be bi but not a couple, hopefully we will see something from them but personally just going to tease the fuck out of us. lol