Max 2017

Don't you hate it when you go to somebody's place and they just can't shut up asking you stupid questions like, " What do you want " and " Who are you " and " omg is that a real gun? "

A guy tells his friend, " Man I think my wife may be dead... " Friend: " What?! Why you think that? " Guy: " Well in bed she's the same as ever but the kitchen got quite messy... "

I tried to re-marry my ex-wife. But she figured out I was only after my money. Honey, what will you give me for our 25th anniversary? A trip to Thailand? Wow, that's awesome, and for our 50th anniversary? Then I pick you up again

No One Lives.

Mad Max.

Last Action Hero.

Belle for me.

New couple friends with Anna and Alex.

Captain Morgan, Vodka, Jagermeister, Carling, Fosters, Stella, Just a few

Tiesto, Carl Cox, Judge Jules, Ferry Corsten, B Traits. 2pac, Biggie, Dr. Dre

Standing At The Bar At An International Airport.. when this small Chinese guy walks in, stands next to me, and starts drinking a beer. I asked him, " Do you know any of those martial arts things like Kung-Fu, Karate or Ju-Jitsu? " He says " No, why the fuck you ask me that? Is it because I am Chinese? " " No", I said, " It's because you're drinking my beer, you little prick. "

A blonde walked up to a coke machine, put in a pound, and got out a coke. She then put in another pound, and got another coke. Again and again, she put in more pounds and got out more and more cokes. As she was doing this, a man came and stood behind her, he tapped her on the shoulder, and said, " What on earth are you doing? " She replied angrily" Shut up! Can't you see I'm winning?! "

During a funeral, the pallbearers accidentally bump into a wall and hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find out woman is actually alive. She lived for another 10 more years and then dies. There is another funeral for her. At the end of the service, the pallbearers carry out the casket. As they are walking out, the husband cries out, " Watch out for that wall! "

Reading the chatbox about Paul calling work and saying he is ill.. He really is a poor excuse for a man. As my dad would say he needs a good Kick up the arse.. lol

If there was a saggy boob competition my wife would beat everyone. In fact, she would wipe the floor with them. Girl: What colour are my eyes? Guy: 36c.

Shut both B1 and B2 down and evaluate the situation. If you think about it both Apartments and B3 should be on another site anyway... Is that "Real Life"?? But you could add a few others to I suppose.

England.

Holland is lovely

Personally remove both.. they are waste of time anyway.

A blonde orders a pizza and is asked if she wants it cut into 6 or 12 pieces. She responds, " 6 please. I could never eat 12 pieces." A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. Hysterically the blonde responds to her husband, " Shut up...You're next! "

Boy: Will you marry me...? Girl: Do you have a house...? Boy: No... Girl: Do you have a BMW car...? Boy: No... Girl: How much is your salary...? Boy: No salary.. But... Girl: No but. You have nothing.. How can I marry you..?? Leave please..! Boy: (talk to himself) I have one villa, 3 property lands, 3 Ferrari, 2 Porsche.. Why I still need to buy a BMW?! How can I get the salary when actually I am the boss.

Eva Mendez.

She may have done this n that but she ain't any different from most... Spends most of her time in bed..... Boring

Angelina Jolie.

England.