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Max 2017

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Everything posted by Max 2017

  1. Had wondered if drink was involved.. they both looked abit awkward and ashamed.. lol
  2. A beautiful woman enters a bar and sits next to a lawyer. " Listen honey, " She says, " For £50. I'll do absolutely anything you want. " The lawyer looks around, pulls 50 pounds from his wallet and says, " Paint my house "
  3. Wife: " Give me some money. I want to buy a bra. " Husband: " Why? You have nothing to put in it! " Wife: " You wear shorts! "
  4. Man goes to a fancy dress party wearing only a glass jar on his penis. Lady asks, " What are you? " He says, " I'm a fireman. " " But you're only wearing a glass jar, " says the woman. He says, " Exactly, in an emergency, break glass. " Pull knob and i'll cum as fast as I can! "
  5. Yeah makes more sense... lol
  6. Agree. More life in a blow up doll or a sack of potatoes.. lol
  7. Seems to be a Russian/Ukrainian thing of not returning the favour.. lol
  8. Amazing how they can go from not liking each other to that lol... Wonder how much they made for that lol
  9. Noticed that too, especially from Sally she makes it so obvious she likes him.
  10. Maybe does modeling on the side.. lol
  11. Indochinese Tiger. ( Speed 60mph )
  12. Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle.
  13. Freddy Vs Jason.
  14. Edward Scissorhands.
  15. Dumb & Dumber.
  16. Why do men always give their jackets to their women when they are cold? Who wants a blowjob from a woman who is shaking with her teeth.
  17. A inexperienced guy talks to his friend about his first encounter with a prostitute. " It was totally crazy. Right when I came she screamed: whip me, bad boy, whip me...! " " What did you do then?", the friend asked. " Well, I didn't have a whip so I head banged her. "
  18. Bill Clinton, George W. Bush and George Washington are on a sinking ship. As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: " Save the women!" George W. Bush hysterically hollers: " Screw the women!" Bill Clinton asks excitedly: " Do we have time? "
  19. A passenger taps a taxi driver on the shoulder. The driver shits himself with shock, swerves nearly hitting a bus and stops inches from a shop window. " Fuck me, your jumpy aren't ya, I only tapped your shoulder" says the passenger. " Sorry," says the cabby, " it's my first day, I've been driving a Hearse for 20 years. "
  20. This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 20 dog, seconds, dog! Now read without the word dog.
  21. Both are pretty bad at making it look fake and over the top, but go for Masha.
  22. Wayne's World.
  23. Vacancy.
  24. Passenger 57.
  25. Ouija.

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