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Yo Momma Jokes.


Scotsman84

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Yo mamma is so ugly when she took a bath the water jumped out.

Yo momma is so fat that when she saw a yellow school bus go by full of white kids she ran after it yelling, "TWINKIE!"

Yo momma's so fat, that when she went to the zoo, the hippos got jealous

Your momma's so ugly, when she goes into a strip club, they pay her to keep her clothes on.

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Yo mama so ugly when she went into a haunted house she came out with a job application.

Yo momma is so ugly even Hello Kitty said, "Goodbye" to her

Yo mamma is so fat she walked past the TV and I missed 3 episodes.

Yo momma so fat when she steps out in a yellow raincoat, the people yell, "TAXI!

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Yo momma is so stupid when your dad sad it was chilly outside, she ran out the door with a spoon!

Yo mom is so dumb that she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.

Yo momma is so fat she sat on the rainbow and Skittles came out.

 

Yo mamma is so ugly, she scared the shit out of the toilet.

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Yo momma's so fat, she got baptized at Sea World.

Yo momma is so stupid that when thieves broke in and stole the tv, she ran outside and yelled to them,"Hey, you forgot the remote!"

Yo mama so fat I tried driving around her and I ran out of gas.

Yo momma's so fat, she has more rolls than a bakery.

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Yo momma's like a bowling ball: finger that bitch, then chuck her in the gutter.

Yo momma's so fat she uses a mattress as a maxi pad.

Yo momma so fat when aliens came to invade us they said, "Wow! two planets in one."

Yo momma so stupid she took a puzzle back to the store because she thought it was broken.

Yo  momma so ugly even the tide won't take her out.

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Yo momma so hairy she shaves with a weed-whacker.

Yo momma so ugly when she went to the beautician it took 12hours - for a quote.

Yo momma is like the sun: Big, Round and hard to look at.

Yo momma so crusty Pizza Hut is jealous.

Yo momma so fat NASA used her to fill a hole in the ozone layer.

Yo momma so fat Stephen Hawkins black hole theory is based on her asshole.

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Yo momma is so stupid she gave your uncle a blowjob because he said it would help his unemployment.

Yo momma so ugly she had to get her vibrator drunk.

Yo momma so fat when she backs up she beeps.

Yo momma teeth are so spaced out it looks like her tongue is in jail.

Yo momma is like a fast food restaurant she takes orders from the front and the back.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Yo momma is so ugly her imaginary friend played with other kids.

Yo momma so fat when she went sky diving in a blue jump suit, all the kids below said, "Ahhhh! The sky is falling!"

Yo momma so stupid when she went to Subway, she asked for a ticket to Chicago.

Yo momma so ugly, people break in to her house to shut the curtains!

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  • 8 months later...

Yo momma is so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.

Yo momma is fat, it took me two buses and a train to get to her good side.

Yo momma is so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.

Yo momma is so depressing, blues singers come to visit when they've got writer's block.

Yo momma is so fat, she has to put her boobs in the back seat to drive.

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  • 3 weeks later...
  • 6 months later...

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