I was checking out at the store today when I noticed the man in front of me put one item on the conveyor belt - a box of condoms. Not only did he notice me staring, but decided to make super uncomfortable eye contact. So, to lighten the mood I put my bottle of ketchup on and said "Looks like we've both bought something to put on our sausages!"

A five-year-old girl went with her grandpa to get his hair cut. She had a snack cake in her hand. She loves her grandpa, so she was hanging on to him. The barber turned to her and said "you're going to get hair on your Twinkie". She replied "I know. And I'm going to grow boobies too!"

5 hours ago, RUBBERMAN said:

OUCH!   Hopefully the dude survived that.

2 hours ago, RUBBERMAN said:

If I was the girl I would kick the guys ass to the curb. To me, he is nothing but a piece of shit.

3 hours ago, RUBBERMAN said:

Nowadays this ain't so funny. The innocent guy could end up in jail.