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mikeusa

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Everything posted by mikeusa

  1. Little Johnny... Big Word The teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multisyllabic words, class. Does anyone have an example of a multisyllabic word?" Little Johnny waves his hand, "Me, teacher! Oh, me, me!" The teacher smiles and says, "Alright, Johnny, what is your multisyllabic word?" Little Johnny says, "Mas-tur-bate." The teacher is taken aback, but she manages to smile and says, "Wow, Johnny, that's a mouthful." Little Johnny says, "No, ma'am, you're thinking of a blow job. I'm talking about jerking off."
  2. nooooooo kitty got new tits I like her body the why it was what's next she gets ass implants
  3. I'm hoping to see more of Victoria and nita became friends just saying
  4. finally there talking hanging out together good job nita and Victoria I hope to see more of you lovely ladies
  5. at least she was not in bed all day .. but she is cute there I said some thing positive
  6. is it just me or is alberto getting a littlie chunky
  7. lovely leora (Image Content No Longer Available)
  8. Your Jackie Robinson There was a white running back that was five votes away from winning the Heisman and white people didn't even give a sh*t. He was your Jackie Robinson -- a white running back. That's like finding a white rhino or something, you ain't never seen that. And his name was Toby, how beautiful is that? If somebody had told you two years ago that the best running back in the country's going to be a white dude and the president was going to be black -- you'd be at work like, 'Yo, they drug test here.'
  9. How Many Guys a Girl Has Slept With Girls should come with that little card. Remember you were at school you used to go to the library to check out a book? And that little card used to tell you how many people checked that book out. All I'm saying is: some girls come with two cards. She's a bestseller.
  10. Adam's New Organs God came to Adam and said, "I've got some good news and some bad news." "Well, give me the good news first," Adam replied. "I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things and have wonderful conversations with Eve. The other organ I have for you is called a penis. It will allow you to reproduce your new intelligent life form and populate this planet." Adam exclaimed, "These are great gifts you have given me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?" "The bad news is I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time."
  11. Little Johnny... Baby Talk Little Johnny runs into his house and asks, "Mommy, can little girls have babies?" "No," says his mom, "Of course not." After Little Johnny runs back outside, his mom hears him yell to his friend, "It's OK, we can keep playing!"
  12. I have join rob1 wgigi mee4youu in the 1000 's post club
  13. Celebrity Look-Alike I was on one of those websites where you upload your picture to the website and it uses face matching technology to find your closest celebrity match. My friend, who's a guy, got Angelina Jolie. I like this technology; he's a guy, he got a girl, I'm going to get a funny celebrity, too. My celebrity look-alike was Anne Frank...Anybody else think Anne Frank maybe shouldn't be on the list of celebs you can get on the site? It should be a light, fun game that you play while you're screwing around on the Internet at work. Not something that immediately references the Holocaust.
  14. Engaged for 10 Months My girl wants to change the engagement rules. She tells me, 'Babe, why do I got to wear a ring and let guys know I'm taken, and you don't got to wear nothing?' I told her, 'Babe, I wear my sad face every day.'
  15. Big Butt I like a big butt, though. I like a butt so big you can sit a clock radio and a drink on it.
  16. Little Johnny's Subsitute Teacher Little Johnny was walking down the hallway at school. When he reaches his classroom he looks inside and sees a sub instead of his regular teacher. Johnny sits down and the teacher says, “Now students, my name is Ms. Prussy. Not the other word, this word has an r after the first letter.” Johnny started laughing. An hour later he forgot her name and said, “Your name has an r after the first letter -- is it Ms. Crunt?”
  17. Note: Due to Spam & Malware Caused by Third Party Video Web Sites Those Links are Not Permitted. (Links From Third Party Video Web Sites Will Be Removed) If you wish to Upload a Video from Other Web Sites, Please Download the Video then Upload it through a Third Party Hosting Site.
  18. My Wife and I Are Really In Sync If my wife has too much to drink at a party, starts yapping a little too much, I don't have to say anything... three little leg squeezes, she knows that means 'Put a sock in it, drunkie, time for you to wrap it up.' Somebody didn't have dinner like I suggested, now you're spouting off at the mouth divulging all the family secrets. You need to pipe down or we've got to fucking leave.
  19. A Problemic Polemic Q: Why did the woman cross the road? A: Who knows why the heck they do anything?
  20. Little Johnny's Stork Little Johnny asks, "Mommy, where do babies come from?" His mother replies, "The stork brings them." Little Johnny, puzzled, asks, "Then who fucks the stork?"
  21. Note: Due to Spam & Malware Caused by Third Party Video Web Sites Those Links are Not Permitted. (Links From Third Party Video Web Sites Will Be Removed) If you wish to Upload a Video from Other Web Sites, Please Download the Video then Upload it through a Third Party Hosting Site.
  22. Note: Due to Spam & Malware Caused by Third Party Video Web Sites Those Links are Not Permitted. (Links From Third Party Video Web Sites Will Be Removed) If you wish to Upload a Video from Other Web Sites, Please Download the Video then Upload it through a Third Party Hosting Site.
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