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Scotsman84

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Everything posted by Scotsman84

  1. Scotsman84
    Must be loosing his touch lol
  2. Scotsman84
    Have a day off lol
  3. Scotsman84
    What are mixed Feelings? Watching your mother-in-law backing up towards the edge of a cliff in your new BMW.
  4. Scotsman84
    You're like my little toe, because I'm going to bang you on every piece of furniture in my home.
  5. Scotsman84
    Does your left eye hurt? Because you've been looking right all day.
  6. Scotsman84
    Only thing he's good at fingering is his nose lol
  7. Scotsman84
    Not seen her yet but hopefully better looking than the last two Female Tenants
  8. Scotsman84
    Yeah because she's such a great watch lol
  9. Scotsman84
    Very nice shame she ain't staying longer
  10. Scotsman84
    Is your dad Liam Neeson? Because I'm Taken with you.
  11. Scotsman84
    Love the profhet lol The Bellend more like
  12. Scotsman84
    One day little Johnny was walking up a hill with his red wagon behind him saying, "Fuck this, " Fuck that." The town priest hears this and walks up to Johnny and says, "You shouldn't swear like that, Johnny. God is all around us." "Is he in the sky?" asks Johnny. " Yes," says the priest. "Is he in that bush over there?" asks Johnny. " Yes says the priest." "Is he in my wagon?" asked Johnny. "Yes," says the priest." "Well tell him to get the Fuck out and Push!!!"
  13. Scotsman84
    A blonde goes to the library to get a book. A few days later, she goes back and says to the librarian at the counter, " This book was very boring. it had too many characters and too many numbers, so i would like to return it." The librarian says to her coworkers, "So here's the person who took our phone book!"
  14. Scotsman84
    Just when you think you got rid of one Nutjob lol another turns up
  15. Scotsman84
    Q: Why have there been less suicide bombings since Susan Boyle's rise to fame? A: Because terrorists didn't know what a Virgin looked like! Sorry Subo lol
  16. Scotsman84
    Boy: "I love you so much, I could never live without you." Girl: " Is that you or the beer talking?" Boy: " It's me talking to the beer."
  17. Scotsman84
    Are you a racehorse? Cause when I ride you'll always finish first.
  18. Scotsman84
    Are you from Tenessee? Cause your the only Ten i see.
  19. Scotsman84
    I'm not a weather man, but you could expect more than a few inches tonight.
  20. Scotsman84
    Hey , wanna come over to Myspace and Twitter with my Yahoo till i Google all over your Facebook?
  21. Scotsman84
    You must be a bannana because i find you a peeling.
  22. Scotsman84
    "Hi, I'm going to have to ask you to leave!" ( Why? ) " The sign says NO SMOKING....... and you are definitely SMOKIN!"
  23. Scotsman84
    I'd like to point out that " beautiful" has U in it. But, ' quickie ' has U and I together."
  24. Scotsman84
    An Englishman, an irishman and a scotsman set up a business as furniture removal men. On their first job when the householder saw the Englishman and Scotsman struggling to carry a wardrobe upstairs, she asked them, ' Where is the Irishman?' 'Oh, he's in the wardrobe stopping the wire coat-hangers from rattling.'
  25. Scotsman84
    A blonde girl says to her friend, " i think Bill is cheating on me. I'm no longer even sure the kids are mine. "
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