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Posted

I am a dog

And you are a flower.

I life my leg up

And give you a shower.

 

Roses are red

Lemons are sour.

Open your legs

and give me an hour.

 

Smoke a smoke

Not a butt.

Fuck a virgin

Not a slut.

 

Roses are red

Violets are blue.

Pornhub is down

Your mums Facebook will do.

Posted

Little Johnny was in his maths lesson one day when his teacher asked him a question to see if he was paying attention.

"If I gave you 20," she began, "and you gave 5 to Mary, 5 to Sally and 5 to Susan, what would you have?"

Johnny thought about this then answered, "An orgy?"

 

Little Johnny comes home from school, and his mom asks, "Johnny, how did it go with your exam? Was it written or oral?"

Johnny replies, "Mom, I think it was anal..... 'Cuz it went like shit!"

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