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Everything posted by Scotsman84
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Miss Taylor the English teacher writes an incorrect sentence on the board: " I didn't had no fun for months." Then she faces the class and says, " Ok class, how should this be corrected? " Little Johnny says, " I think you should get yourself a better man! " Little Johnny was asked, ' What would you like for your birthday? ' He said, " Tampons please. " " Tampons!? Why do you want tampons for your birthday!? " He replied, " I saw a great TV ad. With a tampon you can go swimming, biking and skiing. "
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Yes. LOL Do you fuck on the first date?
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Shower. Beard or No Beard?
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Late one night a burglar broke into a house and while he was sneaking around he heard a voice say, " Jesus is watching you. " He looked around and saw nothing. He kept on creeping and again heard, " Jesus is watching you. " In a dark corner, he saw a cage with a parrot inside. The burglar asked the parrot, " Was it you who said jesus is watching me? ", The parrot replied, " Yes. " Relieved the burglar asked, " What is your name? " The parrot said, " Clarence. " The burglar said, " That's a stupid name for a parrot. What idiot named you Clarence? " The parrot answered, " The same idiot that named the Rottweiler jesus."
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I saw a teenage kid on the subway today. He had a Mowhawk hairstyle dyed yellow, green and red. He caught me staring at him and in a nasty voice asked, " What the fuck you looking at? " I replied, " Sorry, but when I was about your age I had sex with a parrot. I thought maybe you were my son. "
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If you and Kelly Brook get together let me know. LOL
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Invasion of the Body Snatchers.
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Hate both. Red if I had too. Lights on or Lights off?
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Annie Wilkes. ( Misery ) Happy Halloween All.
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Ashamed to say I don't know the difference.
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No. Have your parents walked in on you having sex?
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Lia or Mia?
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Winter Olympics. Scotland or England?
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Yes, can see my neighbours kitchen from my backdoor. Have you masturbated knowing you are being watched?
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Orgy. RLC or VHTV?
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Yes, and got caught. Have you ever had sex in a elevator/lift?
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Yes. Have you been seen nude at home/garden?
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Join RLC. Sex in the bath or Sex in the shower?
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Hard-on.
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Sexting. Me, Bogdan and Nelly or Me, Bogdan and Linda?
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Just boxers on. Do you watch porn most days?
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Had sex and masturbated in a tent. It's fucking intents. LOL Have you ever been arrested?
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Teacher. Sex under the stars or Sex in a tent?
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Teacher. Had at least four I would have loved to fuck after class or in the toilets. Using a toy yourself or Someone else using it?