Scotsman84

A daughter asked her mother, " Mom, how do you spell ' Scrotum '?" Her mom replied, " Honey, you should have asked me last night ----- it was on the tip of my tongue. "

A little boy and his friends are being called bastards and bitches by bullies at school. The boy goes home and asks, " Dad, what are bastards and bitches?" And his dad replies, " Bitches are ladies and Bastards are gentlemen. " Then the boy goes upstairs to see his mom. As he enters the room, he accidentally knocks over a perfume bottle, and his mom says, " Shit! " " Mom, what is shit?" and she says, " Perfume. " So he goes to see his dad ( who is carving a chicken ), and his dad cuts himself and yells, " Fuck! " The boy asks, " Dad, what does fuck mean?" and dad says " Preparing. " Then he follows his dad upstairs. A few minutes later his mom and dad are about to have sex when his dad says, " Where are the condoms? " The little boy asks, " What are condoms? " and his father says, " Condoms are coats and jackets. " The following night his father invites over some important business clients. The boy opens the door for them and says, " Hello! Please come in, bastdards and bitches. Hang your condoms up here, my mom is upstairs rubbing shit on her face and my dad is in the kitchen fucking the chicken. "

Some People are never satisfied.. Lol

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Not Jealous of anyone on RLC.. Just part of Life some people you Like and some you Don't like.. If you Can't handle your Favourites being Slagged off don't join a Chat Forum.

Superman was bored one day and was flying around the city when he saw with his x-ray eyes Wonder woman in her apartment lying on her back in bed, all naked and legs apart. So in a flash he swooped in an open window, made love to her, and quicker than lightning flew off. " What was that? " asked Wonder Woman. " I don't know, " said Invisible Man on top of her, " but my ass hurts like hell...."

To make it stand, you wet it. To make it wet, you suck it. To make it stiff, you lick it. To get it in, you push it! Damn ! Threading a needle at any age is no joke!

Looks like we have Estelle Fan.. Lol I am sure she is fond of you too

Quite Simple Don't like it, Don't watch it.. Plenty other Apartments But no I wouldn't be watching them.

Oh ok You.. Thought you ment someone else.. lol

Like everything else they don't pay for it so why would they give a Fuck

A Nora & Kiko fan.. Would never of guessed.. Lol

What a Shame was starting to like them two.. Lol

I don't mate.. wasn't my cuppa tea but very funny.. Gotta love a Goer.. lol

Good Girl.. I bagsy being next.. lol

The bell rang for school to start and John walked in late. Mr. Clark asked, " John, why are you late? " He replied, " I was on Cherry Hill." Then he sat down. Ten minutes later Nathan walked in late and Mr. Clark repeated, " Why are you late?" Nathan answered, " I was on Top of Cherry Hill." Five minutes later Kevin walked in late and Mr. Clark said to him, " Kevin, where have you been?" Kevin replied, " I was on Cherry Hill," Ten minutes later a girl walked in the classroom and Mr. Clark asked, " Hi there, what's your name?" The girl replied, " Cherry Hill "

Three Guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren't enough rooms, so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, " I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a hand job! " The guy on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he's had the same dream, too. Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, " That's funny, I dreamed I was skiing! "

Hopefully a lot of Solo action too.

If you were at B1 Friday with the girls and could have sex with them one after another what would be your order? Mine- 1. Nicole 2. Karol 3. Danaya 4. Nora 5. Irma 6. Jessica

Hatton Garden Loot. ( Wasn't Me )

Two guys are standing in line to enter heaven. One turned around and asked the other how he died. " I froze to death. How about you? " " I had a heart attack. " " How did that happen? " " Well, I suspected my wife was cheating on me. So after work I went straight home. I ran upstairs to find my wife sleeping by herself. Then I ran back downstairs and looked in all the hiding spots. When I was running back up the stairs, I had a heart attack. " That's Ironic." " Why? " " If you would've looked in the freezer, we'd both be Alive. "

There's a blonde and a brunette in a car. The brunette is driving while the blonde is in the passenger seat. They're going down a steep hill when the brunette realizes that the brakes don't work. The brunette tells the blonde that the brakes don't work and they will drive off the side of the cliff because they failed to stop. The blonde then replies, " Don't worry! There's a stop sign ahead. "

People can say what they want about the set-up here.. Set-up at CamCaps is Crap Just my Opinion.

If you ever fart in public, just yell, " Turbo Power! " and walk faster

A little boy was in the bath with his mom. The boy said, " What is that hairy thing, mommy? " She replied, " That is my sponge" " Oh yes, " said the boy, " The babysitter has got one too. I've seen her washing dads face with it. "